Surgery went OK

The surgery went OK – I didn’t freak out too much. And I didn’t even back out at the last minute even though they gave me that option. The most frightening part is when they move you from the gurney to the table and strap you down. I was really fighting panic at that point as you can imagine. But then they give you the anesthesia which burns like a fire in your vein and lights out.

I woke up in recovery and wanted to vomit so badly and couldn’t. They kept telling me to open my eyes but whenever I did that the room spun and I wanted to throw up. I couldn’t keep my eyes open, I couldn’t keep the room from spinning and I couldn’t vomit. I kept saying I’m nauseous, I’m nauseous, then they gave me something for the nausea. “This is going to hurt.” Never trust a nurse who says that because it’s probably going to hurt worse than you think.

WHAM! A needle slams into my thigh. Does that help? Not really, no. Then I heard them saying the doctor says maybe she just has to vomit. (I’m sure that’s good for the rearranged digestive system.) I didn’t vomit after all, but I got a little blue baggy to take with me just in case.

Anyway, it’s been 3 days and my leg STILL hurts! I’m not sure the shot helped the nausea much either.

I’ve been lying in bed or on the couch reading, watching tv, or sleeping for the past 3 days. I’ve tried getting up & walking around – hobbling is a better description. I tried the solid food thing too soon & felt like crap so it’s soup, crackers & yogurt for me. I can only sleep in 1 position so my back is cramping up. Hopefully this will only last a few more days.

Speaking of cramping, I think I need to rest now. I’ll write more when I am feeling better.


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3 thoughts on “Surgery went OK

  1. I’m very glad to read that you made it through, although it was obviously and ordeal – which you’re still recovering from. This may seem like a very odd observation to make, but you have a wonderful gift for description. I honestly felt as though I was at the hospital, going through it all with you. Not the most pleasant thing to live vicariously, but being able to convey your experience so vividly is a talent that not many possess, so I wanted to compliment you on it.

    Rest up, my dear, and take good care of yourself. I hope that you’ll feel better than ever very quickly.

    • You’re very welcome. And you didn’t trigger anything for me, but I appreciate your concern.

      Here’s my take. If someone is going to read a blog on bipolar, or anything else to do with struggle, they most likely know what they’re getting themselves into. Or they should, anyway. I know I blog about loads of things, but I only once have put a warning notice up at the start of a post. It was during the height of my most recent post-traumatic stress episode, and the post contained a very violent and explicit outburst, something I have never expressed in any capacity in my life. I put it up more so that people would know what they were letting themselves in for and less because I was concerned about triggering.

      Living with bipolar, and especially now with PTSD, I know that anything could trigger me. I can read the details of someone’s ordeal with hospitalization and the trauma they incurred, and while I empathize and feel for them, it doesn’t knock me off my feet. But tonight I was reading a book with one of my girls, “Tuck Everlasting,” and there was a moment where the only reason I was able to forcibly restrain the tears was because I knew she would see them.

      I think it’s a wonderful, understanding, and thoughtful quality in you that makes you think about that. But unfortunately you can’t protect the whole world. It would be wonderful if you could, but people have to learn for themselves what they can and cannot handle, and unfortunately that usually has to be learned the hard way.

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