High school may be out of the question

Well, I was reading up on the requirements to teach high school, once I found them buried in the state board of education website, (don’t you love broken links?) and discovered there is another whole application process that I have to do before I can take the tests. This process can take up to 6 weeks, so if that happens then there is a very slim chance I can take the tests (with results) in time to teach this year. Since the schools aren’t even willing to entertain the notion of hiring me before certification, this leaves me in quite a bind.

So where do I go from here?

Even if I get through all that process, they do a FBI and criminal record background check. Would I even pass that with bipolar disorder?

There are so many fees involved too… each test has a fee. There are enrollment fees, application fees… it would be about a $400 job application to teach high school, and I’m not sure I have the self-confidence to do it in the long run. I’m not sure I have the self-confidence for anything.

I dreamed about the university position last night. I dreamed that I was doing the interview all over again, only not screwing it up. I really want that job, I just wish I had answered that one question right: which upper division classes would you be comfortable teaching? Well, hell, I can teach all of them (if I have the self-confidence). That’s what it all comes down to in the end: self-confidence. If only I had been hypo-manic instead of stable for this interview, I would have nailed it.

This waiting is killing me. If I had done that right, I might have an offer by now. I really hope I get the university job. My self-confidence tells me I can’t do it, but another part of me says I can. It’s all pointless now until I hear back from them.


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3 thoughts on “High school may be out of the question

  1. I don’t see why you don’t do it for next school year, or even a summer school summer camp. The pay isn’t glamorous, but if it’s better than unemployment, do it.

    As for the background checks, they are looking for violent crime. They can’t touch your medical records because of the protection of HIPPA. Unless you have violent crime, or crimes against children, don’t worry about them. It’s for children’s protection. Besides, if I can pass a background check, so can you. And my program doesn’t fall under the deparment of education. It falls under the department for public welfare because it’s a community program.

    I hope you get the university job too. Not that you don’t like kids, but they can be tough, even for seasoned teachers. I think you’d find that you’re happier teaching young adults. You’re brilliant. You just don’t know it yet. You’ll do great at teaching university!

    • Thank you, Lulu. I don’t feel brilliant at the moment. I feel downright stupid. 😦 I really enjoyed my trip to the university and I don’t think I would mind the hour commute. (People in big cities do it all the time.) I probably would be happier teaching in a university setting, but I would be touching lives in either scenario. I think that’s what I truly need in my life.

      • My commute is about an hour, and I don’t even live that far away from the city! So, yeah, long commutes are pretty commonplace now. It sucks that so much time has to be devoted to the act of going to work.

        I really think you’re right. Teaching changed my life. It gave purpose to my efforts. Teaching is probably the only profession that brings such instant gratification. Last week, I taught the Kindergarten class Stelle Ella Ola, and yesterday, I saw them in a group with the older kids playing it. It was a crowning moment for me. I couldn’t be more proud and more satified.

        The social element of it is great. It’s not so demanding like acting where in certain states it would be possible to do. And it forces a person out of isolation. I’ve dragged my pathetic butt out of bed more than once when all I wanted was to stay in bed. It has kept me from doing stupid and harmful things. Can’t go to work hungover. And I can go to work in a bad mood. In professions like that, people are people, not workers.

        I do hope you get it. You deserve it. It would be so good for you!

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